Hello to all that wish to read...

Ok so this is my blog... my story, my means of release(or so I hope) ..a way to unburden myself and my mind from married life in the 21st century.

In the middle of my 30's, have been married for 6 years (or is that 7 never quite sure) and life is good. Well, that is to say that I have a lovely wife and a lovely house. I work in finance for a secure company in a secure job in London. I have a nice car, a superb dishwasher, have good friends& family.

However something is missing. What could possibly be missing? I do not know.

Of course having "something missing" in your life I do not consider generally healthy. Could it be that married life is the cause of such a void? Something I find very intriguing is the possibility that my marriage, (you know the thing people do to feel happy, feel wanted and secure) is in fact the cause of my current dismay.

When I met my wife I was in my mid to late 20's. Was at my peak of confidence, living with a now ex-friend (that’s another story to be shared ..maybe).. times were good. Very little in the way of responsibility, and more than enough money enabled me to live life as I wished..

Then we met. Things were great to begin with. Not spectacular but ..great. She was dependable calm, clear headed, sensible. After a few weeks I remember calling time on what I thought to be a short relationship.

As if it was yesterday can remember the conversation which mostly comprised of her crying and me telling her "it's me, not you". (very cliché I know) Then something happened during this conversation. She started to question my goal in life. She started to question me and where I was heading.

Like a fool I listened. The following year we were married. Husband and Wife.

Now here I sit alone. Trying to make some sense or where I am now and what I am doing.

One thing I do know; I need to get my life back. I need excitement. I need to reclaim my life. I do love my wife. But I no longer think that is enough.

Jamie S